Ask Jaymz
Well, this idea hasn’t taken off yet. I haven’t received any questions, so I was forced to scour the internet in search of people in need of help. This week’s questions were taken from the Frequently Asked Questions section of the P-mate website. I have substituted my name for the product name where necessary and assigned names and personalities to these questions. Our first question this week comes from Jessica in London, England. She writes:
“Dear Handsome (Jaymz),
Can I use Jaymz with trousers on as well? By the way my phone number is, ___-___-____. Give me a call sometime. Oh, and kippers, what-what and bangers and mash and all that, if you know what I mean.
Cheerio,
Jessica”
Well, Jessica, this is sort of an odd question to ask, but of course you can. This blog (and its author) can be enjoyed with or without trousers, or pants, as we call them stateside. I’m not sure if I understand all of your colloquialisms there, but judging from all of the material that my censors edited out, I do know what you mean and it is quite suggestive. The other question this week comes from Heather in Sioux Falls, Iowa. She writes:
“Hey Jaymz!
Sometimes I go somewhere and I only want to take 1 or 2 Jaymzes. How do I have to do that? Thanks for always being there.
Your number one fan,
Heather”
Heather, this question is one I get all the time, believe it or not. Human cloning has not been perfected yet, and until it is, I will not even consider creating another Jaymz. Even if the technology improves, there are legal and religious ramifications that complicate this issue. All I can tell you is that you’ll have to live with just one Jaymz for now like everyone else. Wow, some weird questions this week. I hope I don’t have to resort to this sort of post again, but if I don’t get questions from other people, who knows? Signing off, I am Jaymz.
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I have many loves in my life. Among them…peanut butter, heroin, and Jaymz Tobe.
Anne, it’s comments like this that make me miss you even more.